Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The Binder

Clay tile by Jenny Mendes

About 9 or so years ago I began printing daily the email correspondence between my Mother and myself, this went on for a year, I put everything in a very large binder. I don't remember exactly what made me do this, perhaps it was because at the time I realized that my Mother's health had begun to decline for no particular reason, but I'm really glad that I did so. Now, when I need to "talk" with my Mom I go to the binder and read the emails, her emails to me and it's like she's right there again talking to me, her words, her style of inflection, her love, it doesn't matter that it was written so long ago, it could have been yesterday but it's these very conversations we shared as Mother and Daughter, as friends, that connect me to her now, how could I have known. This binder has become one of my most valuable and cherished possessions.
The holidays are upon us, my family is small, my memories are many and lovely with details. Cherish those memories and cherish the ones you love deeply now.

2 comments:

Kat said...

hi Carey- this post struck me as I just spent 17 days in NM with my mom. First in intensive care, and then on to hospice. She is now in some miracle state of recovery @ hospice, altho each day is day by day....she doesn't e mail, but I have been taking notes & quotes during this time, many make us all laugh....xoxo K.

Carey said...

I'm sorry to hear that your Mom is so sick but happy to hear that she is in a state of recovery. Will you spend the holidays together?
Yeah, it's those small things that you really miss, like the words that you exchanged, the sound of her voice. Her handwriting is also really important to me..I have her little notes she sent me as well collected.
Be well Kat!